Hope is a renewable resource
And we are strong and resilient
When Hillary lost in 2016, I was inconsolable for days.
I was so horrified by Trump’s candidacy and I had been living in Los Angeles for so long I forgot about the Trump bumper stickers alongside confederate flag stickers on the big trucks in my old hometown an hour east of Los Angeles, Corona in the Inland Empire. I talked to my brother the next day and he said, “if our ancestors survived Andrew Jackson, we will survive Trump.”
This year I spent hours trying to convince my best friend’s nephew, a young-ish Mexican-American Marine, that Democrats are not Socialists or Communists and that Trump was lying about not knowing about Project 2025–that it wasn't a Democrat conspiracy theory. I heard that the “Democrats and Republicans are exactly the same” or “Democrats ruined everything… they just use us for votes, but look down on people of color.”
I think this election was lost for many reasons, but the narrative about Latino voters is a very nuanced as Latinos are not a monolith. Latinos have been targeted by misinformation and propaganda since 2020. The ecosystem of lies started ramping up far before the 2024 election cycle.
At my aunt's house in El Monte (a town in Los Angeles County that is east of Los Angeles) this past weekend my Latino cousins who all voted Harris/Walz were despondent over Trump's win. All of us are second, third, and fourth generation who didn’t grow up speaking Spanish. One of my cousins told her brother, “Hey you better keep your passport on you at all times.” Because he is darker skinned than the rest of us.
I’ve seen so much commentary and blaming of what went wrong for the Pro-Democracy side. Being clear-eyed as to the risks ahead of us, the most important thing is that we protect the marginalized from the true Trump believers who seek to harm. This election result is due to a confluence of factors, and many things can be true at the same time, but in my observation it is in no small part the combination of a bombardment of lies and misinformation along with a huge dose of racism and xenophobia and fear mongering/scapegoating.
Back to Corona, in congressional district 41, this year it looks like Ken Calvert might eke out another win where he’s been the same congressman since I was in my first year of community college 30 years ago. The district has changed so much since I grew up there. Calvert never had a serious challenger until the last couple of years. When I was a young adult working at The WhereHouse music store in 1992, the one openly gay guy could not work the closing shift as he had been jumped and beaten up too many times by the big-truck-driving terrorists who had stalked him at closing-time. This year Ken Calvert barely won against challenger Will Rollins, his openly gay opponent. This was unthinkable 30 years ago.
One of the many things I’ve learned since 2016 is that there is will be no superhero (Robert Mueller, Jack Smith) who will save us. As a 12-stepper (in addiction recovery programs), we talk about learning how to take “life on life's terms”, essentially accepting and acknowledging reality and the hard truths as painful as they are.
The benefit of having lived through the last eight years and also being in recovery is I know and accept who Trump is - a severely mentally ill fascist and white supremacist with quickly advancing dementia surrounded by the most corrupt and morally deficient people. It is a truly scary situation that we are in no doubt.
I have seen people start to be despairing and lose hope and I just felt compelled to share my experience of the last 8 years. Hope is a renewable resource. This is the third time I voted against Trump. The first four years I spent glued to the news and outraged at every horrible thing he said and it was not healthy and drove me to a really dangerous place. As I was not sober yet, the situation really triggered my past unhealed traumas and was indulging in alcohol and drugs to cope. In January of 2018 i hit a bottom when I suffered a massive hemorrhagic stroke in which I became paralyzed on the left side completely for one entire month.
I remember one doctor telling me that I might have to just learn how to be a paraplegic and deal with the fact that I would never walk again. I was heartbroken but I started to realize that he didn’t know what would happen and I had choices. I had been through so much before including surviving cancer twice, I knew that I could find the strength within me that I would never give up, and today, though I still am recovering, I am walking and making art every day. I let myself cry and grieve, but go within to tap into my own reasons, values and meaning.
I wrote the following paragraph in a text thread of friends who were feeling sad: “I was shell-shocked and heartbroken on Wednesday, grieved and puttered yesterday. Today I woke up feeling the strength of a thousand ancestors giving me the fight back in my heart and soul and spirit. They may have won the battle but this is not over by a long shot and I’m ready to be the warrior that I’ve always been! I’m not ceding this world to the league of petty tyrants and racists! They don’t know how ready I am. I was born for this moment!” We are born for this moment or we wouldn’t be born in this time and place. As Kamala said in her various speeches, the baton has now been passed to us. We are the superheroes who will save us.
Field Notes: A CatraChicana Between Worlds
Newsletter by Sylvia Marina Martinez. Pro-Democracy Artist sharing my experience, strength, and hope. Two-time cancer survivor, stroke survivor, Gen X, California-Born, Chicana-Catracha in 12-step recovery.